A foolish man will blame you for taking his foolish advice.

I was listening to a summary of “The Way of Monkey Book” and I thought I’ve experienced this a few times.

This also reminded me of when toxic people intentionally set traps. For example, a family member who did bad things in the past told me they are coming to town and with my approval set up a meeting with me. At the last moment, they said that someone that had done really bad things to me is coming as well. The first referred to family member used to enable the bad behavior of the second one who became a narcissist because of how they were treated. I wasn’t going to be put into a situation where past trauma might be re-experienced because the two of them team up to try and make me the bad guy to justify their poor treatment of me over several decades.

So I told the family member that made the original plan this is what we agreed to and this is what I was prepared for so if the other person is coming for my own well-being I won’t. I will never allow one of them to successfully set a trap for me again even though I can handle it.

An Alpha and a Gentleman

I’ve been hearing the word Alpha used incorrectly to explain a high-value man more and more every year. What’s disturbing is how often I hear it used to manipulate men to do what someone else wants. Being an Alpha doesn’t mean you are a good man, or you are supportive of your woman, all it means is a man has proven he is dominant. Being a disagreeable man, an unethical man, or a jerk doesn’t make a man Alpha either.

What I think women are trying to say they want is an Alpha and a Gentleman, that is also not to be confused with a man that’s Alpha at work and Beta to her. To be an Alpha and a Gentleman requires the man to do a lot of work and he can’t be both unless he has a balanced life and is true to himself. Those few men who are both Alpha and Gentleman have done a lot of work to get where they are and they are kind enough to be nice to others when respect is returned to them in kind. They are still men who have feelings and experience challenges/limitations. To be Alpha and have a good heart at the same time they can’t act beta and submissive when it’s convenient to someone else and then turn back into Alpha when it’s also convenient to someone else.

Complex post-traumatic stress disorder

Not medical advice. Therapies that tell the survivor their problem is in the mind and even to take ownership of what happened to them have their place. I believe in taking ownership but that isn’t a cure-all for everyone. I imagine that telling survivors their problem is in their mind brings them shame that was the case with me. I strongly believe in taking ownership of my life so I was wondering why I was still suffering after I did so much right for so long. After reading a book called Complex PTSD: From Survivng to Thriving I discovered my inner critic was, in my opinion, the largest part of my identity. Realizing I coudlnt’ be perfect enough to accept myself I went through some of the exercises to aid in addressing the inner critic and what lead to its development.

My sense of self was broken down and I couldn’t figure out why; now I understand. If you had a tough childhood or were emotionally manipulated over a long period as an adult, this is probably worth bringing up to your psychologist.

Lessons from dogs and dog trainers.

A dog trainer develops communication skills by paying close attention to another species and learning to communicate with it.  I have met dog trainers with excellent interpersonal skills and the customers of the dog trainers really appreciate finding the trainer easy to talk to.  The trainer in a way is a translater between a person’s dog and the person themselves.  The better the dog trainer the better they are able to communicate with the owner and that will make the owner more confident when they are also training their dog.  To increase the confidence people have in you learn to communicate what is important to you really well.

You have to be part of your own rescue.

I was talking to a friend looking for ways to improve my interactions with people and told him about the times I tried to save negative people but they just took from me without changing for the better at all and he said they gotta participate in their own rescue. When I asked him if he coined that he told me Corey Wayne says that all the time. I agreed and referred back to another thing The King Ray-Ray said and that is to put a forcefield up between you and negative people. You have to choose very carefully who you spend your time with and be even more careful about who you decide to help.

Some people will take any help you give them and make the most out of it while others will turn it into something negative. If you help someone and they turn it into something positive that’s good for both of you so if you have a giving heart you owe it to yourself to make sure that you aren’t taken advantage of.

What you feed your mind becomes reality.

Recently I asked a man who’s younger than me how he has consistently been able to work 100 hours a week year after year. I wasn’t looking to copy his lifestyle and work 100 hours a week myself but I saw something in him and I wanted to learn from him. I listened to a video he sent me a link to called How I stay Connected to GOD and I was skeptical but I listened because he took the time out of his busy schedule to talk to me. After I watched the video I said to him what you take in affects how you view the world, how you think, and what you like. I realized I had the intention of blocking negative energy my entire life but I always let it in thinking I have enough willpower not to let it affect me.

I realized I was wrong because in a video by The King Ray-Ray he stated he remembers the bad scenes from a horror movie he watched years ago to this day but on the positive side when he watches something funny he might randomly laugh for months afterward. So he chose to only watch positive content now.

Exercise 2.0

Here is the new magic exercise routine where you don’t have to work as hard to get a body you want. Make changes that are within your means, if you haven’t been exercising every day and calorie counting what makes you think you will start now? If you are 30 pounds overweight do you really want washboard abs or will you be happy to drop 20 pounds and change your physique for the better while still enjoying your vices just not as much? You burn fat from your frame and add muscle while keeping the same friends and eating at the same places.

I made a statement a few years ago in a fitness community that most people would gain a huge boost to their confidence if they get into pretty good shape. If you are really focused and aim for a 4 pack will you not be happy that you achieved that because you don’t have a 6 pack? I read on steelsupplements.com that “about 15% of people have 4-pack abs while 2% of people have a 6-pack. Steelsupplements.com states that is to do with a lot of different factors that I am not bringing up here that are still interesting to read. I looked up the stat to bring up a picture of hidden meaning. In my personal experience, it’s harder to get a 6-pack than a 4-pack but I still feel great when I have a 4-pack. No, I didn’t do the work it takes to get a 6 pack but my stomach is almost flat and I feel great with that appearance.

I still like ice cream, pizza, and watching shows in the home theatre I had built because I like my downtime and strive to make the most of it. Sometimes I think I’d like to be in better shape and completely shredded and that doesn’t take away from how I feel about myself. I have spinal injuries and do exercises to keep them from getting worse every day. I am in fairly good shape because I take time every day to maintain my current level of health and make myself a better person. I feel I have a pretty good balance in life and I believe if you take some time out of your day to take care of yourself you will have a more balanced life as well.

Not medical advice.

Amazing regenerative peptide.

I have read and read about the amazing beneficial claims of the copper peptide GHK-Cu. Research is still being done but it’s likely it can positively change Gene Expression and reset parts of the body to a healthier state. It might even remove inflammation from the brain, heal injuries, and improve overall health. The benefits people claim they have had are unreal.

Here are several articles because I am not recommending you take this but if you are interested you can do your own research.

Article 1

Article 2

Not medical advice.

If you are young and stressed out you might have a really hard life when you get older.

There have never been more resources available for personal growth than there are now. Chances are no one is coming to save you I hope you utilize those resources and take ownership of your life. Make sure you vet the sources that you choose when taking their advice because a lot of people are selling what I call self-help and education porn. People will recommend a course of action to you that they haven’t tried or researched to get more views on their channel.

Seek the advice of a professional if you have medical or mental health problems this is not meant as an alternative to professional treatment.

Double down on what you are best at.

Stop putting in a lot of work to do what you are ok at. Make a plan first though and work on your purpose part-time. If you haven’t already pursued your passion are you going to put in the work if you quit your job? If you pursue your passion part-time with a plan to make it your full-time income you will be changing the way you think while you still have a steady income.